Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Appointments and More!

Everyday seems like it brings on tears and excitement all wrapped up into one very emotionally charged wife.

Excitement comes from the fact that today I scheduled appointments for my new primary care doctor, my new RE, and my new hairstylist. Whoo! The best appointment news by far was that I get to see my new RE in two weeks. My egg donor and I will be going in together to discuss my history and the new plan and have the initial consultation. I am relieved to know that it is in just two weeks because I waited about three months for my initial referral and consultation with Dr. S.

Last night and today I did a lot of research on embryo adoption that mainly come from the leftover embryos that couples donate for other couples. I have been really amazed that going this direction would still cost about 5k.  While certain expenses are completely understandable, I'm a little disgusted with the companies because they make more work than is legally necessary in requiring a home-study. I get why donating parents might want a home-study done, but for those that don't? Why is being required? Having a baby seems to be just more business for a lot of places than anything. Call me idealistic, but I don't think having a baby should be all about money.

The tears came today when my hubby came home, and I told him my 'exciting' news about the consult. He reacted to the news by asking what was the point in me flying down there. I can understand him wanting to know why this visit is necessary and trying to clump as many appointments together as possible to reduce traveling costs. However, I took it quite badly because he was being his usual loud Italian self. Of course, I went on the defensive and ended up bursting into tears and curling into a ball on our bed. We worked it out in the end, but what it comes down to is that...I do not ask the same questions that he does. When Dr. S. tells me to schedule a consultation for me and my egg donor--I do that! I assume it is necessary. Hubby wants to know why, what's going to happen, and how often I'll need to go down there. The tears just came because I'm walking on an emotional high-wire and keep falling off!

Hope all is well in blogland!



  1. I TOTALLY understand the emotional highwire!! It's not a fun ride - hang in there!

  2. The emotional high wire sucks for sure. Being a loud Italian myself I think we don't always realize the power and brashness with which we speak sometimes. I also think that no matter how hard they try husbands just don't get it. I, like you will make the appointments and not question my RE. He/She is the expert right? Men, including my husband see things very black and white and need the details so they can grasp it. Don't sweat it. Continue looking forward to that appointment. Longest.two.weeks. ever!

  3. hubbies definitely look at the more "logical" side of everything. i completely agree with joy...they are just all like that as annoying as it is to us! hang in there girl and good for you for getting all those appointment set up, big accomplishment!

  4. Oh my- I'm so sorry about your day! Sometimes husband's just need to ask "ok, what am I supposed to say about this" otherwise they say something wrong. I'm glad that you have found a road to travel on, though slightly off course of the origional plan, I think it's WONDERFUL! You'll be in my thoughts...

  5. Wow I miss a few days of reading and your plans have changed drastically. What an amazing friend to offer her own eggs for your use. That is an amazing and selfless gift. Also, don't beat yourself up for being emotional, it's the drugs talking and acting not you.

    I can't wait to see what your next step will be.

  6. Ah -- it sounds as if your husband went all logical and rational when all you really wanted was "hey -- that sounds great. Nice job in setting all that up!" I'm glad you sorted things out and congrats on moving forward with the new plan(s)!

  7. That tightrope is sure a tricky thing to stay on! I know!

    Congrats on the appts and for making a decision that you are so comfortable with. What a great place to be in right now!

  8. Mr. Hatter would probably react the same way (and then so would I!). It is a lot of excitement to deal with, and everything seems to be happening so quickly. Wishing you well with all of your appointments!

  9. We did not have to do a home study with our EA. We adopted 6 embies and I found out just yesterday I AM PREGNANT!!!!!!!! YIPPEEE! We got our embies at www.miracleswaiting.org

    My blog has lots of info about embryo adoption. Our total cost was around $3400! Blessings on your journey!