Yep, I had a date today! A blogger date! I can kind of be shy when I first meet someone IRL, so I was a little nervous to meet Mrs Pave! She's one of those people who you feel like you have known forever once you get chatting. Talking about the fun of IF, being married to military men, teaching...while eating a little Mexican food made for a really good day. Since we both have flexible schedules, we're going to hit some shopping a little later this week. Yippee!
Is it really Halloween today? I wouldn't know since my hubby wanted to be the Halloween grinch this year. We turned our light off. Gasp! Yep, we were those people this year. It was probably much better for my mental health anyway!
There is a ray of hope that I'm daring to get slightly excited about in the IF ring. Might this be another piece of the puzzle coming together? ...keep all of your appendages crossed!
Happy Halloween!
xoxo
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Thursday, October 29, 2009
The comfy horse...
Our merry-go-round was a little merrier today. The financial coordinator at my Louisiana RE's office called me back today with the estimate of what the donor egg cycle. Let's just say that they don't have any extra charges besides the tests required by the FDA which will cost, wait for it, $459. In addition, I will need to contact a lawyer to draw up our contract.
My lovely clinic does not split the cycle and charge independently for FairyEgg's treatment and my treatment. They don't squeeze me for every possible dime (or possibly penny) in my pocket. They don't charge a $7800 administrative fee! Yay!
Granted, I know that my doctor is probably one of the most reasonable in the entire United States. In fact the coordinator told me that he hasn't raised his rates in five years since he opened up the clinic. Seriously? Tell me that his focus isn't helping people! I get it, it's a business. I certainly hope he makes a reasonable profit because he works very hard! But at the same time, as a patient, I respect him for his perspective. It kind of restores my faith in people.
So, it looks like we've taken a step closer. We're going to wait for a Day 3 test for FairyEggs sometime this month. Soon I will need to talk to the nurse and figure out how to coordinate and lump together as many tests as possible to keep FairyEggs from flying down there as much as possible. She is a complete trooper about all of this because she's willing to endure the flying and needles that she is none too fond of. At least we will be taking the comfy horse route and going with people I know! I can't wait for her to write some guest blogs!
I'm also really happy that FairyEggs' Mom (whom I adore) will be coming down for the fun during the monitoring and egg retrieval. She'll definitely help keep FairyEggs calm and more relaxed during the process.
In other news, I dyed my hair a bright red color and changed up the style a bit. Red and fun! Maybe it's a girl thing, but there is something so refreshing about doing something new with the hair. It's certainly helped me feel better and gain a little tiny itty-bitty piece of perspective.
xoxo
My lovely clinic does not split the cycle and charge independently for FairyEgg's treatment and my treatment. They don't squeeze me for every possible dime (or possibly penny) in my pocket. They don't charge a $7800 administrative fee! Yay!
Granted, I know that my doctor is probably one of the most reasonable in the entire United States. In fact the coordinator told me that he hasn't raised his rates in five years since he opened up the clinic. Seriously? Tell me that his focus isn't helping people! I get it, it's a business. I certainly hope he makes a reasonable profit because he works very hard! But at the same time, as a patient, I respect him for his perspective. It kind of restores my faith in people.
So, it looks like we've taken a step closer. We're going to wait for a Day 3 test for FairyEggs sometime this month. Soon I will need to talk to the nurse and figure out how to coordinate and lump together as many tests as possible to keep FairyEggs from flying down there as much as possible. She is a complete trooper about all of this because she's willing to endure the flying and needles that she is none too fond of. At least we will be taking the comfy horse route and going with people I know! I can't wait for her to write some guest blogs!
I'm also really happy that FairyEggs' Mom (whom I adore) will be coming down for the fun during the monitoring and egg retrieval. She'll definitely help keep FairyEggs calm and more relaxed during the process.
In other news, I dyed my hair a bright red color and changed up the style a bit. Red and fun! Maybe it's a girl thing, but there is something so refreshing about doing something new with the hair. It's certainly helped me feel better and gain a little tiny itty-bitty piece of perspective.
xoxo
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
merry-go-round
Roller-coaster? Tight-rope? Space Mountain? Today I've decided I'm on a merry-go-round. Why you ask? Because on a merry-go-round, you not only spin in futile circles, but you also go up and down on your little horse! That's pretty much me in a nutshell right now. I know, I know....I have been very aware of my craziness lately. It's because I'm really without a plan, spinning in a circle. As my family knows, I'm pretty much only happy when I have a plan. Until I have a plan, I am in full research mode making the effing plan! So here is a list of the horses that are swirling around in my head:
- The shiny pink horse (aka donor egg cycle with known donor) - My donor, FairyEggs, lives very close to a medical center where a friend of my current RE works. Yesterday I made the appointment for a consultation with Dr.M in a couple of weeks and also asked to speak to the financial coordinator. She wasn't in, but she called me with all of the financial goodies! Oh yay! Come to find out, a known donor cycle there still incurs a $7800 administrative fee at that clinic! Which would make a grand total of $19,304 + meds + some additional testing. Hmm. That doesn't really fit into my responsible budgeting.
- The comfy horse - Bite the bullet and drag FairyEggs across the country to my current RE back in Louisiana. This would mean lots of time in a hotel. Also FairyEggs would have to be away from her FairyKiddos for quite awhile which is very hard for her. So right now, I'm waiting for their financial coordinator to call me to let me know how much a donor egg cycle would run there. Since the laws in Louisiana are different, I'm hoping for a better price and the comfort of working with people I know.
- The shady green horse - Called Shady Grove Fertility to get the pricing for their shared risk, shared donor and also the shared risk donor programs. Wow, they really bring the price down by sharing donors cycles! What is more impressive is that they put their money where their mouth is and offer 100% refunds for their shared risk program. They also work well with out-of-town patients and have what looks like a well-oiled plan to reduce travel times. Might be worth pursuing.
- The frozen horse - Embryo Adoption/Donation. Yes, you have heard me rant about this in my previous post, but it is still an option as I might find someone willing to privately donate their embies if they are done growing their family.
- The red horse with stars - Adoption. A fellow blogger pointed me a direction of a very reasonable domestic infant adoption program. They contacted me within an hour of my request and were very straightforward. For this though, we would really need to wait until we moved. :( Ugh.
These are all the fun things spinning around in my head. Of course my hormonal ups and downs are keeping life fun too. Good thing my husband loves me! :)
xoxo
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Appointments and More!
Everyday seems like it brings on tears and excitement all wrapped up into one very emotionally charged wife.
Excitement comes from the fact that today I scheduled appointments for my new primary care doctor, my new RE, and my new hairstylist. Whoo! The best appointment news by far was that I get to see my new RE in two weeks. My egg donor and I will be going in together to discuss my history and the new plan and have the initial consultation. I am relieved to know that it is in just two weeks because I waited about three months for my initial referral and consultation with Dr. S.
Last night and today I did a lot of research on embryo adoption that mainly come from the leftover embryos that couples donate for other couples. I have been really amazed that going this direction would still cost about 5k. While certain expenses are completely understandable, I'm a little disgusted with the companies because they make more work than is legally necessary in requiring a home-study. I get why donating parents might want a home-study done, but for those that don't? Why is being required? Having a baby seems to be just more business for a lot of places than anything. Call me idealistic, but I don't think having a baby should be all about money.
The tears came today when my hubby came home, and I told him my 'exciting' news about the consult. He reacted to the news by asking what was the point in me flying down there. I can understand him wanting to know why this visit is necessary and trying to clump as many appointments together as possible to reduce traveling costs. However, I took it quite badly because he was being his usual loud Italian self. Of course, I went on the defensive and ended up bursting into tears and curling into a ball on our bed. We worked it out in the end, but what it comes down to is that...I do not ask the same questions that he does. When Dr. S. tells me to schedule a consultation for me and my egg donor--I do that! I assume it is necessary. Hubby wants to know why, what's going to happen, and how often I'll need to go down there. The tears just came because I'm walking on an emotional high-wire and keep falling off!
Hope all is well in blogland!
xoxo
Monday, October 26, 2009
Sincerity Award
Bat-Chit Crazy!
Looking over my blogs from the last week I seriously think I'm bat-chit crazy. Up and down doesn't even really describe what I have been feeling. From all of the changes, I feel like I've been riding on Space Mountain--flying through the dark with random bright lights appearing. It makes me feel ashamed of myself in a way like I should be stronger and more in control.
I know that all the craziness will subside...I just gotta get there.
I know that all the craziness will subside...I just gotta get there.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Phone Call with RE
This morning I woke up to a phone call from my doctor. First, he apologized for waking me up. Like I'm going to complain that my doctor returned my phone call on a Sunday at 9:30 when my lazy self was lounging in bed! I'm just glad he got back to me so quickly!
He started off with a discussion that although the percentage of success is probably around 20% for my eggs, we could keep pursuing that if we wanted. I quickly stopped that train of thought because I am much past the emotional heartbreak that my eggs keep giving us.
Then he started explaining the logistics of donor eggs and the laws in Louisiana. Did you know that in Louisiana, it is illegal for a donor to be compensated for their "donation"? I was quite surprised when I had first learned this through an article on google. Although a lot of countries don't allow egg donation for compensation, it is quite a lucrative business in the U.S. with donor fees alone running between 5-10k.
Anyway, when I explained our situation with moving and the donor, he said that he was sure that he could find someone more convenient for us than trying to travel back to Louisiana.
He assured me that my donor information sounded good. Moreover, even though he didn't have someone right off the top of his head in Missouri, he does have a good friend who practices where my donor lives. I haven't found too many good things about two of the clinics where she lives but apparently the third clinic is where his colleague works. He told me he had tried to lure her away from her current practice many times to become a partner with him! That in and by itself is a great indication of her quality.
What I most appreciated about our discussion is that he is not just leaving me to the wolves even though we have moved out of the area. I feel he has our best interests at heart. As such, he's going to call his colleague to talk to her about us and double check the clinic's statistics before he sends us that direction. He also told me that I could call or email him anytime with questions even when we are working with another doctor if we had concerns. I think that's pretty awesome.
**********
Also, I must say thanks to Liberal Granola Girl and Khiara for my nomination for the Kreativ Blogger Award! As per the rules, here are the seven things you don't know about me:
1. My husband and I met in a country bar in Korea.
2. I hate cake, but love pie and cookies.
3. I would rather buy dog toys than jewelry. (I just lose it anyway! Eek!)
4. I'm the only person in the south who prefers unsweet tea to sweet tea (sugary sludge, I tell you!)
5. My first year of marriage, I lived with my sister. lol
6. I never wanted to be a teacher. hahaha
7. Right now I should be grading papers but am instead blogging!
Have a great day!
xoxo
He started off with a discussion that although the percentage of success is probably around 20% for my eggs, we could keep pursuing that if we wanted. I quickly stopped that train of thought because I am much past the emotional heartbreak that my eggs keep giving us.
Then he started explaining the logistics of donor eggs and the laws in Louisiana. Did you know that in Louisiana, it is illegal for a donor to be compensated for their "donation"? I was quite surprised when I had first learned this through an article on google. Although a lot of countries don't allow egg donation for compensation, it is quite a lucrative business in the U.S. with donor fees alone running between 5-10k.
Anyway, when I explained our situation with moving and the donor, he said that he was sure that he could find someone more convenient for us than trying to travel back to Louisiana.
He assured me that my donor information sounded good. Moreover, even though he didn't have someone right off the top of his head in Missouri, he does have a good friend who practices where my donor lives. I haven't found too many good things about two of the clinics where she lives but apparently the third clinic is where his colleague works. He told me he had tried to lure her away from her current practice many times to become a partner with him! That in and by itself is a great indication of her quality.
What I most appreciated about our discussion is that he is not just leaving me to the wolves even though we have moved out of the area. I feel he has our best interests at heart. As such, he's going to call his colleague to talk to her about us and double check the clinic's statistics before he sends us that direction. He also told me that I could call or email him anytime with questions even when we are working with another doctor if we had concerns. I think that's pretty awesome.
**********
Also, I must say thanks to Liberal Granola Girl and Khiara for my nomination for the Kreativ Blogger Award! As per the rules, here are the seven things you don't know about me:
1. My husband and I met in a country bar in Korea.
2. I hate cake, but love pie and cookies.
3. I would rather buy dog toys than jewelry. (I just lose it anyway! Eek!)
4. I'm the only person in the south who prefers unsweet tea to sweet tea (sugary sludge, I tell you!)
5. My first year of marriage, I lived with my sister. lol
6. I never wanted to be a teacher. hahaha
7. Right now I should be grading papers but am instead blogging!
Have a great day!
xoxo
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
