merry-go-round

Roller-coaster? Tight-rope? Space Mountain? Today I've decided I'm on a merry-go-round. Why you ask? Because on a merry-go-round, you not only spin in futile circles, but you also go up and down on your little horse! That's pretty much me in a nutshell right now. I know, I know....I have been very aware of my craziness lately. It's because I'm really without a plan, spinning in a circle. As my family knows, I'm pretty much only happy when I have a plan. Until I have a plan, I am in full research mode making the effing plan! So here is a list of the horses that are swirling around in my head:

• The shiny pink horse (aka donor egg cycle with known donor) - My donor, FairyEggs, lives very close to a medical center where a friend of my current RE works. Yesterday I made the appointment for a consultation with Dr.M in a couple of weeks and also asked to speak to the financial coordinator. She wasn't in, but she called me with all of the financial goodies! Oh yay! Come to find out, a known donor cycle there still incurs a $7800 administrative fee at that clinic! Which would make a grand total of $19,304 + meds + some additional testing. Hmm. That doesn't really fit into my responsible budgeting. 
• The comfy horse - Bite the bullet and drag FairyEggs across the country to my current RE back in Louisiana. This would mean lots of time in a hotel. Also FairyEggs would have to be away from her FairyKiddos for quite awhile which is very hard for her. So right now, I'm waiting for their financial coordinator to call me to let me know how much a donor egg cycle would run there. Since the laws in Louisiana are different, I'm hoping for a better price and the comfort of working with people I know. 
• The shady green horse - Called Shady Grove Fertility to get the pricing for their shared risk, shared donor and also the shared risk donor programs. Wow, they really bring the price down by sharing donors cycles! What is more impressive is that they put their money where their mouth is and offer 100% refunds for their shared risk program. They also work well with out-of-town patients and have what looks like a well-oiled plan to reduce travel times. Might be worth pursuing.
• The frozen horse - Embryo Adoption/Donation. Yes, you have heard me rant about this in my previous post, but it is still an option as I might find someone willing to privately donate their embies if they are done growing their family. 
• The red horse with stars - Adoption. A fellow blogger pointed me a direction of a very reasonable domestic infant adoption program. They contacted me within an hour of my request and were very straightforward. For this though, we would really need to wait until we moved. :( Ugh.

These are all the fun things spinning around in my head. Of course my hormonal ups and downs are keeping life fun too. Good thing my husband loves me! :) 

xoxo

Hit the Brakes!

That's the screech of the Let's-Have-a-Cini-Baby Plan you hear! Perhaps we (I) were too hasty in announcing our plans to the world and my family and my friends.  So now what you are hearing is our discussion of what we might do. 

Today V and I went shopping at an outlet mall about an hour from our house. Between the lack of weekday traffic and constant rain, we pretty much had the place all to ourselves. That's my kind of shopping! So is it strange that V bought more than I did? Of course, I cracked a joke when we walked by the maternity store saying "Yay, now I don't have to buy a new wardrobe!" I laughed. V looked at me like I was nuts! I also passed on the beautiful, shiny purse that sucked me in at the C.oach store. Yep, I'm happiest with sweats, fun and comfy shoes, and a pretty purse.

At lunch, V told me he was rethinking things. But first you have to understand that my husband literally NEVER changes his mind. It took me a good year of dating him to convince him that khakis were not the enemy. So anything that changes is usually with me pointing out  something over a long, long period of time. 

So as we were talking about home-studies, V explained that the information I gave him about donor eggs had sunk in more. We talked more about the details and decided to put donor eggs back on the table with adoption.  

Hopefully tomorrow we will be having a discussion with Dr. S about the next step. Then some more thinking about whether or not we will switch to a closer clinic now that we have moved, donor eggs....lots of stuff! 

Thanks for all of your support over the last few days. 

xoxo