Sunday, September 27, 2009


My friends, I am panicky.

After my last IVF cycle, I never sat down with my doctor and had a WTF discussion. No recap, no lessons learned discussed. No, I was focused on moving on to the next cycle and just took his plan for what it was...pulling out the micro-dose flare protocol (aka the big guns).

I was fine with this until tonight when I read Dr. Licciardi's blog about hCG. Then my mind started whirling. Essentially last time my estrodial number did not match up with the follicle sizes. (Should be 200 units per @15-18 mm egg) We went ahead because we thought that the follicle sizes were prevailing. When they got in there to aspirate the eggs, most of the follicles were "empty." That's why we got three eggs, two mature, one fertilized and transfered.

So I went to to find out what the hell "empty" follicles meant. I didn't find much information other than perhaps this happened because the hCG didn't work in the final maturation of the eggs. This had happened to someone else on one of the message boards, and she had good success in her next round.

Tonight I was reading Dr. L's blog and started wondering about the correlation between follicle size and estrogen level because he said the low levels were not considered as opposed to how they are used with OHSS-hyper stimulation. But I thought...what? I'm confused. (Have I confused you yet? )

I should ask more questions. But, I've tried so hard to keep most of my feelings on lock-down so I'm not some crazy patient. Now I feel like I've been stupid for doing this. Hence, now the panic is setting in. I know this is irrational because I've had the last month to ask questions and now I'm panicking the night before my first scan?

I went ahead and sent an email to my doctor, who I'm sure will be happy to discuss this with me tomorrow. Until then...deep breaths.



  1. I hear you. I work for a doctor, but she doesn't really know anything about this IVF process. In her questions to me, I find more and more uncertainty in what I am doing! It is so overwhelming to understand all the details of the hormones and meds etc. I am sure your doc will be happy to discuss and sort it all out with you. Deep breaths and happy thoughts my dear! It's so complicated isn't it? The fertile Myrtle's of the world are clueless! What ever happened to getting knocked up by an empty beer bottle and a broken condom. Geesh!

  2. Ask those questions girl!!! Its not too late to have that conversation...and you had a LOT going on after your last IVF cycle so don't beat yourself up over it.

    I hope that when you go your doc will be able to answer all your questions and calm your fears!

    And btw...all IVF girls have to be a little crazy (after all we go through!!) so don't be afraid to let those feelings show!!! Perfectly normal!!!

  3. Well, it is better late than never! It would be perfectly alright to aske them. Hope your doc has good answers.

    Thanks for the really sweet comment on my blog...and yes, All the very best!

  4. I am so proud of you!! You are an amazing, determined, and beautiful woman and I am in awe at what you have accomplished as always! You are well on your way and as you guys have said, nothing is OFF the table! Love you guys and thinking of you.