It's hard for me to be hopeful during the cycle right now. I caught some nasty germ from the airport or mouseland that now has me feeling like death warmed over. I literally slept all day today trying to knock it out. After all, this is really not the freaking time to get sick! My throat is killing me and my body literally feels like a truck ran over me, backed up to see what it hit, and then decided to put me out of my misery with one last smush. . . Some of the stuff kind of comes and goes, but overall, it just keeps coming.
Monday we went back to the doctor's office which definitely has a different atmosphere than my last clinic. I'm not so much concerned about the atmosphere as I am with how FairyEggs feels and the outcome. My first lining check was great at 10 mm with a triple stripe. Whoot. FairyEgg's ten follicles were actually measured this time and ranged from 8 - 12 mm. The doc thinks that the egg retrieval will be pushed to Sunday which is the day before FairyEggs is scheduled to go home. Argh! I don't want her to travel that quickly, but I guess we'll have to roll with it! We are also unsure with what happens to the eggs when you stim for twelve (or more) days. We're hoping for quality eggs.
Tomorrow FairyEgg's mom comes to visit and help out in just being here for her daughter. They really have a beautiful relationship, and I love them both dearly.
With this cycle, I have definitely reverted back to guarding my heart very carefully. I want this to happen, but I dare not hope or get ahead of myself in the planning. One step at a time right? I am also bogged down in the day to day reality of the waiting. Besides the cyle, I think about spending quality time with FairyEggs, Tink, and my family, keeping up with my work schedule from home, staying connected with my hubby and helping him edit his Masters papers, and helping out around the house.
After plunking down another $750 for FDA labs that have already been run, but have to be done again within 30 days of the egg donation and another $1k on medications, I think my husband finally tapped out. He said to me the other day that we should plan on this being our last cycle. As much as I figured this would be our last try at a fresh cycle, I've still been considering embryo donation as an option if this cycle doesn't work out. Who knows? Day by day.